3 Coping Skills for Anxiety (For Adults & Children)

Anxiety doesn’t just show up in one age group. Adults feel it in their thoughts, tension, and constant mental “what ifs.” Children feel it in their bodies, behaviors, and emotions they don’t always have words for yet.

One of the most powerful ways to support anxiety — for yourself and for your children — is through simple, repeatable coping skills that calm the body first. When the body slows down, the mind has a better chance to follow.

Below are three effective coping skills that work for adults and can easily be taught to children, making them tools your whole family can practice together.

1️⃣ Slow Breathing to Calm the Nervous System

Anxiety often speeds up breathing without us realizing it. Slow, intentional breathing sends a message to the brain that it is safe to relax.

For adults, try breathing in through your nose for 4 seconds, then slowly breathing out through your mouth for 6 seconds. Repeat this several times, allowing your shoulders and jaw to soften.

For children, make it playful:

• “Smell the flower, blow out the candle”

• “Bubble breathing”

• Placing a hand on the belly and feeling it rise and fall

Practicing this during calm moments helps make it easier to use when anxiety starts to build.

2️⃣ Grounding With the Senses

When anxiety pulls our thoughts into the future, grounding brings us back into the present moment.

A simple grounding exercise is the 5-4-3-2-1 method:

• Name 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can feel

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

For children, this can be turned into a “sense scavenger hunt” or a calm-down game. You can also shorten it by focusing on just sight, touch, and sound depending on their age.

Grounding helps remind the body that right now, in this moment, it is okay.

3️⃣ Muscle Tension and Release

Anxiety often lives in the body as tight muscles — clenched fists, tense shoulders, or stiff legs. Learning to release that tension can bring quick relief.

For adults, gently squeeze a muscle group (hands, shoulders, legs) for a few seconds, then slowly release. Notice the difference between tight and relaxed.

For children, turn it into a game:

• “Robot to noodle”

• “Freeze like ice, then melt”

• “Squeeze like a lemon, then let it go”

This skill helps both adults and kids become more aware of their bodies and how to intentionally relax them.

Practicing Together Matters

Coping skills work best when they are practiced before anxiety feels overwhelming. Using these tools during calm moments builds confidence and familiarity.

When children see adults naming feelings and using coping skills out loud, they learn that anxiety is not something to hide or fear — it’s something that can be managed with support and practice.

Anxiety doesn’t mean something is wrong. It means the nervous system needs reassurance.

With patience, repetition, and connection, these skills can become part of daily life — for children, parents, and caregivers alike.

If anxiety feels overwhelming or begins to interfere with daily life, working with a counselor can provide additional support, tools, and understanding tailored to your family’s needs.

You don’t have to navigate it alone